Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Don't really have a title...

Thank you all for your kind words. I am feeling better, I can walk again and returned to work on Monday. I see the RE on Friday.

Last week I only spotted. I guess b/c I was on bed rest from the fall. But once I got to work I started bleeding, just like an AF. A wave of relief overcame me once I actually started to bleed. I already know the whole spotting for ever ordeal from my 2nd m/c and I don't want to go through that again. I just want to bleed and move on. Sorry if that sounds horrible.

After talking to DH, who finally opened up to me about the losses and why he doesn't get excited when I show him a BFP, we will take the rest of the summer off and start back again in September. The consensus from the few family and friends that know of our journey is I need to live in a bubble or go on immediate bed rest. I don't know if that would help especially that early on, but I don't know what else I can do to help me get to my take home baby. DH wants us to move to a 1st floor apartment so I don't have to worry about stairs. I just don't know.

Do I just have THE worst luck in the world, or is there seriously something wrong w/ me?

I can't believe for a minute, I was ready to throw in the towel. I was ready to say enough, BASTA! But I can't, b/c if I do, then all this would be for nothing. I am not ready to give up on the only dream I have.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010



I can't think of anything else but why.

Why me? Why again? Why did I have to go? Why did I have to drink so much water that kept me going back to the bathroom? Why was I so clumsy?

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

CD 2 ~ I guess...or what would have been 5w3d

I fell. I slipped on a stupid lil rug in my Sister in laws bathroom on Sunday. I slipped and fell and thought I just fucked up my knee. I lost my baby too.

Friday, July 2, 2010

20dpo aka 4w6d

Yesterday's Beta was 891. That's a 1.92 doubling time. Only issues is my P4, it went back down to 12. I am taking 500mgs of progesterone now.

I am so trying to forget that I am. It's hard when your boobs hurt like hell and every smell in the world is horrible. OMG!!! I am trying not to puke.

I am not sure if you come back after you comment and read the comments, but I wanted to thank all you ladies for showing your support. I don't get a chance to read my subscribed to blogs as much as I used to, but I want you to know that I am thinking of you too.

U/S on Tuesday. I took the day off.