Tuesday, October 28, 2008

See SPOT run, see SPOT hide, see SPOT again

So that's all I have been doing for 1 week 2 days...spotting. I have not actually bleed yet. My boobs still hurt which makes me think that my progesterone has not gone down even though it was 9.6 a few weeks ago. I stopped my supplement last Monday. The spotting is driving me nuts. I just want this over with.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Medical Mystery aka Where's Waldo?

Monday afternoon I went to the ER b/c of spotting and sudden cramps on my left side. I was there from 3:30pm-10:30pm and was then transferred to another hospital b/c this one did not have ob/gyn services. Why did it take them 7 hours to tell me this? They should have told me that the moment I told them I was pregnant. At the first hospital they took blood and did u/s. I was told they were having trouble reading the u/s. I felt like telling them to let me see, I can tell them if there’s a baby in there or not. So finally this doctor comes and tells me that w/ a BETA of 5400, they should be able to see something and since they can’t and I am having the pain on my left side, they are going to transfer me to another hospital that should be able to see if it’s ectopic. I was so mad that they kept me for so long. Once I was transferred, I had blood and u/s done again immediately, and again, nothing on the u/s. I was told that they are going to admit me. Since nothing was seen on the u/s again, they may have to do laparoscopic surgery and check the tube. I didn’t want to lose my tube.

So, Tuesday morning a total of 4 doctors came to see me, all at different times. I had to keep answering the same questions. They could not understand why I was taking a diabetic medication if I was not Type II, they did not understand why I was on Prometrium for my low progesterone. They thought it was ectopic too. They were going to give me Methotraxate, but wanted to wait since they knew it was a wanted pregnancy. I kept telling them to call my RE. The doctor said he did not have privileges in this hospital. I know that!! I didn’t want you to call him so he can come see me, I wanted them to know what happened…and hopefully b/c ya’ll are stumped he could tell you what to do!! The one doctor kept asking me if I had invitro I said no, and explained my cycle again telling him I had an IUI for better chance. They just didn’t know!! And it frustrated me to no end. I was told that my BETA went down to 4500 so they are going to keep me another day and watch what it does. Now, I am not a doctor, but you are telling me my BETA is going down, what is there to be stumped about, I am having a miscarriage. I kind of felt like they were giving me false hope, when I knew it was already over. They sent me for another u/s. The u/s tech told me to tell them to stop sending me, that I was too early, that I may have miscalculated when I conceived. I told her that I had a monitored cycle and I could tell her w/in a few hours difference exactly when I ovulated, I am not off in my days. She said I had a lot of cysts, and free fluid (due to being hyperstimmed), but still nothing in or out of the uterus. So, I stayed and waited. Meanwhile after not having much pain all day, it became excruciating that night and always on my left side. I was so scared it was ectopic and my tube was going to burst. The pain eventually subsided again.

The lady doctor came back Wednesday morning and said they were going to run another BETA and based on that make a determination. This was 7am. BETA drawn shortly after. And I waited and waited and waited. Meanwhile, I am not bleeding heavy, just mostly spotting. Only feeling pain if I move a certain way or when I get up to go to the bathroom. Hubby comes to see me and finally at 3pm the doctor comes back. She says that she just spoke to my RE (YAY!!) and since nothing is found on the u/s I have already passed the baby. My BETA is 3500. I am having a natural m/c. And to follow up w/ my RE in 2 weeks to have my levels checked. We are not sure yet why I m/c again. I think it’s stress related. I can’t seem to keep calm, work issues, home issues w/ my step son, and the whole OMG I am going to lose this baby and checking the TP every time I go to the bathroom thing. And there’s the progesterone issue.

Hubby and I decided we are going to take a break. 2 m/c within 5 mos is too much for us. We have waited 10 years, what’s a few more months…right? When I see the RE in a few weeks I am going to discuss going on BCP b/c I don’t want another 21 day bleeding episode. I am going to take advantage of the gym my job has opened and try to lose some weight too. After the New Year when my heart and body are healed, we will try again.

Thank you all for your thoughts, prayers, and love.

Monday, October 20, 2008

5w6d

Will I ever make it to an u/s where I can see a bean???

Started bleeding red yesterday, DH wanted to see if it would stop like my other spottings did. Well, it's not heavier, but it's not stopping either. I am going to the ER so they can tell me what I already know...I am a baby killer.

Why does this keep happening? How can you be above 40 on progesterone and a mere 5 days later shoot down to 9.6??? I just don't get it. I was foolish enough to think this was the one ...shit my beta was 442!!!!!! We were worried about multiples...now....worried if we have one survivor in there. Doubt it.

I am lost.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

5w2d

Thank you all for your kind words.

I was supposed to go in today, but b/c of what happened on Tuesday I went then. Now have to wait until next Thursday. I hope I make it that far.

No spotting and no cramping to report. Seriously can't find anything to eat that won't make me gag.

This site says that P4 in the first trimester could range from 9-47.

Progesterone levels also can have quite a variance at this stage of pregnancy. They can range from 9-47ng/ml in the first trimester, with an average of 12-20ng/ml in the first 5-6 weeks of pregnancy.

With both hCG levels and progesterone levels, it is not the single value that can predict a healthy pregnancy outcome. It is more important to evaluate two different values to see if the numbers are increasing. Levels of hCG should be increasing by at least 60 % every 2-3 days, but ideally doubling every 48-72 hours. Progesterone levels rise much differently than hCG levels, with an average of 1-3ng/ml every couple days until they reach their peak for that trimester. In situations when there is a concern of an ectopic pregnancy or miscarriage, hCG levels will often start out normal, but will not show a significant increase or will stop rising all together, and progesterone levels will be low from the beginning.

I know...I am looking for any and all hope that when I go back my baby or babies will be ok.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

5w1d

I had a scare yesterday at 5w. I woke up to pink spotting. It lasted from 5am to about 8am. I went in to see the RE and had b/w and u/s. Lining is still thick, 13mm, which he says is good, but still nothing on the u/s to see. Bad news is my P4 dropped from greater than 40 to 9.6. My Beta is 1200 which it should be around 1600 if doubling every other day. I just don’t know what to do. I have not had anymore spotting and am now taking 200mg of prometrium twice a day. I can’t do this again. The doubling time is 3.5 days.

I have been put on 100% pelvic rest. And must keep my feet up when I am home and at work no lifting or walking if I don’t have to.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

16dpo ~ Beta Results

I waited all day for their call!!! They normally call after 3pm EST. I called them at 3:45pm and said...listen I know we are supposed to be patient and wait but I am at the edge of my seat here. The receptionist said that the nurses were discussing todays cases with the doctor and should start making calls soon.

So...drumroll please...BETA is



442!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


progesterone greater than 40!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

14dpiui - Official Test Day

It's still a BFP!!!

Photobucket

The one on the bottom is from today.

Monday, October 6, 2008

13dpiui

Here is my play by play of the weekend…

On Friday aka 10dpiui I took a $store test in the AM, the line was only one sided and I don’t know if it appeared in time, b/c I went to sleep. On Saturday 1:45am I took another $store test and this time the line filled the entire space, but it was barely there. It appeared w/in 10 minutes, but I had to turn certain lights on hold it at a certain angel and open the cartridge. At 1:50pm Saturday, I took another test, this time you could see the line…still very faint, but didn’t have to strain as much as with the first one. I told DH I needed to go by some real test before I drive myself nuts. So, with my $2 internet coupon and $3.50 CVS extra bucks, I got 2 FRER test. I went to the bathroom in the 1am hour of Sunday aka 12dpiui and there was some pink spotting. I wanted to die. I came out of the bathroom and said to DH, it’s over before it even begins. He just said huh, I said never mind and tried to go to sleep. Of course, I had my moments of OMG it’s implantation spotting, but when I look at other charts it usually happens at 8-9dpo. At 5 am I went to the bathroom w/ my FRER, peed in a cup, but before dipping the stick, I checked the TP and there was nothing there …PHEW!!! So, I got a very noticeable second line, not as dark as the control line, but visible enough that I did not have to hold it a certain angle or under a certain light and it showed up w/in the time frame. Throughout the day I was freaking and praying that I would not get any more spotting. I didn’t get any pink on the TP, but my CM looked yellowish, I have never seen that before. I am so scared I will go to the bathroom and see pink. I did not test this morning. I have one more test and I am saving it for tomorrow morning aka 14dpiui.

Part of me wants to be excited, but part of me is so scared. I don’t have any symptoms. My boobs don’t hurt except for the occasional tenderness of the nipple. I have been sick as a dog with a cold all weekend. And then there are the WHAT IFs. The biggest one being…what if it’s still the HCG Booster….and the second biggest…what if there is no second line tomorrow.

I am going nuts here!!!!

I will post a pic of the test when a buddy from work gets in w/ their camera

phone.

Sorry it's so blurry it's the best we got.

Photobucket

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

8DPIUI aka 2DP2500IU of HCG

So, DH didn't want me to buy test, b/c the RE said to wait 8 more days. Well, while in the $store the other day I said I was going to buy some so that I could see when the HCG booster left. DH was totally against it. So what does a POAS addict do to get her fix. She tells DH after work yesterday to take her to the $store. So he goes to find a parking and I say why are you parking you don't have to come in. LOL He was happy enough so he just waited curbside. I went in and bought 5 test and hurried and put them in the back seat.

What happens when you POAS with a $store cheapie @ 8DPIUI aka 2DP2500IU of HCG, you ask?!!? You get the faintest of faint lines. That's good right...that means it is leaving. PHEW!!! Now for the scary part, what if ...you know...what if...that second line....doesn't show back up???!!!??? I am so scared.

On the boob front, still got some soreness, not as much as the past two days. The extra soreness could have been b/c of the booster shot.

My next test, will I get a 'Period Pimple' tomorrow. During June and July's 2ww, I got a pimple at 9DPO.

QUESTION~A Beta HCG is measured in mIU/ml and the HCG shot is measured in IU. So how many mIUs are in an IU?? Would 2500IU = 25mIU??